has some fact ever just suddenly hit you? the whole *ding* and the light bulb goes on kinda of deal.

yeah, that happened tonight. only it was a bad light and now I can’t turn it off

Bridge Over Troubled Water

When you’re weary, feeling small,
When tears are in your eyes, I will dry them all;
I’m on your side. When times get rough
And friends just can’t be found,
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.

When you’re down and out,
When you’re on the street,
When evening falls so hard
I will comfort you.
I’ll take your part.
When darkness comes
And pains is all around,
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.

Sail on silvergirl,
Sail on by.
Your time has come to shine.
All your dreams are on their way.
See how they shine.
If you need a friend
I’m sailing right behind.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will ease your mind.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will ease your mind.

if it’s not bad enough they ass-rape you with the prices…then they try to buy them back at less than 1/10th of what you paid for them.

screw you university bookstore. you capitalist pig.

seems like I’m always changing, trying to match the situation or my new life experience. I changed to come to college, to go to highschool and I was always glad to change, it was a good change I was ready for it.

i’m not now. i’m not ready to graduate and move away from here and never come back. it is striking me as such a bitter bitter thing to graduate and go so far from everything I’ve known these last 4 years.

i’m only going on to grad school, i’m only moving 2 and a half hours away. but it’s everything.

i don’t know what i’m going to become and I don’t know how much more change I can handle and still be me as I am now i’m hardly recognizable from what i used to be…maybe someday i’ll want change, but now, all i want is things to be how they were back when i was happy - and i can’t have it.

i’m going to lose so many people and sometimes i don’t think they even realize it or give a flying rats ass about it if they do.

it’s sad. i’m sad. i’m bitter. what have I got to look forward to? 2 years for my master’s degree in a lonely studio apartment without even cat. then what? a job? a phd or two? i’m lost in a world that not only doesn’t care that i’m lost i think it’s glad that I am – it’s easier to deal with aimless wandering minds they don’t make you think or try to make you see or listen

so what have i earned from time here in bg?

imperviousness to most weather extremes.
a BS from a semi-crappy university

lost too much for that to be all i’ve got

i’ve had the friends? but how long will they have me? I don’t want to be “that one girl” the one who can’t let go of you or of anyone else…

I don’t even know what to do to concentrate on anything anymore. I have nothing left to hope for in the future that I can remember right now. So why bother? For hope. the hope that i’ll remember what is good in the future. the hope that this empty, dark, soulless feeling will go away. the hope that someday my life won’t feel like a shattered, wasted wreck.

it didn’t always

maybe it won’t always

i can try to hope.

Take the What High School
Stereotype Are You? quiz, by Angel.