We do longies
Month: April 2003
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i was off wandering the xanga lands before class and was reading steph’s website about her momma wanted her to have babies
i’ve had this conversation recently too
except it was with my dad and he offered to take care of the kid until it was 5 or 6 (he also offered this to another friend of mine, Colleen)
what the hell? he’s got Darcy who is 10 months old, and my sister is already like 4 month pregnant with her second child
i don’t need no stinking babies, i don’t want no stinking ‘roids, and i definitely do not need anymore stretch marks!
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my younger sister pulled an April Fool’s trick on my mother
my mother didn’t think it was funny.
everyone else thinks it to be hilarious. my mother LOVED to pull jokes on us as young, gullible children (c’mon, Wild horses running down the middle of the road? and we all fell for it? geeeze!)
so, on April 1st, my little sister calls to tell my mother some “news” I’m not sure exactly how she couched all of this… but she ends up telling her that she and her b/f have been “intimate” or some shit like that. of course, in my mental reinactment, there are pained silences following that announcement. and, from telling her that she’s been intimate, my sib leads right up into telling her that she is pregnant. Now, she’s 20 years old and a sophmore in college, and her boyfriend is a freshie at a different college. so i’m quite sure my mother was….a little upset to say the least. but she keeps her cool (sort of) and keeps saying into the phone, attempting to be supportive: “it’s all right, we’ll talk about it in person when you get home this weekend…”
after who knows how long of stringing my mother along, my sister then ends the suspense with “April Fool’s!”
i imagine my mother probably said some really bad words. but don’t you think that’s hysterical? i personally do – hah, and so does my father!
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why does going to the post office always take 45 minutes?
why does my ceiling fan still have dust on it?
why can’t we invent saran wrap that doesn’t CLING more to me than it does to my dish?
why does the common cold still make me miserable but we can do marvelous things with other viruses?
and where is my floating Jetson car? my robot who does my laundry (and ooooo boy is there a lot of it!)…
dammit, this is the 21st century and we still don’t have lazer guns or virtual reality that’s worth the name “virtual”
bugger that.
